Last post but will update after the Gathering. · Thursday February 8, 2007 by Ann
This will be my last post. Lucy and I are off to the EO Gathering near to Dartmoor a little later. Hopefully we’ll make it, there is snow here in Worcestershire but not down there apparently.
We are getting our gear together and will set off early and take it slowly. Tom thinks I am quite mad, but one of the advantages of living near the main roads and motorways is that I don’t have any minor roads to cope with in the snow. I’m pretty sure if we can get out of the drive and onto the main A38 we’ll be fine.
Bless him he has gone outside now to check the car over before I set off.
David and Alice are here, college is closed by the snow. Predictably David has started to do more work on his own Fantasy game, which he has written himself and is the Games Master (GM) for.
Alice is up, excited and hunting out the sledge!
She has been out already with her camera, taking lots of pictures of the snow. Photography has been one of her hobbies for a while and she has taught her self to be proficient with a ‘proper camera’ with help from another HE parent and from experience.
She has also been out with the digital camera too for instant gratification.
There is music coming from all directions in the house. I am so pleased we have neighbours who have had teenagers too! ;o)
Lucy is making a home made veg soup for us to take in a flask, to keep warm on the way. She is also in the middle of packing her clothes. Since the children are teenagers they have chosen to be responsible for packing their own clothes for trips away, making my life so much easier. They have learnt from their mistakes but Lucy still just runs through what she needs for a trip away, with me before we leave, to make sure she has remembered all the clothes she will be likely to need. I’ll gather up and pack the rest.
We live in a smallish house and packing for HE camps was a nightmare, as the gear was kept all over the house before. Now however we have a trailer tent and all the camping gear lives permanently in that.
Although we have been home educating for six years, this actually the first EO Gathering that I have been to! Our children have been to several, individually, attending with other lovely parents acting as their responsible adults. I have of course done the same thing for others at camps that I have attended.
It just usually happens that the EO Gatherings coincide with me working. I could have attended the Gathering at camp in Leicestershire last year, but all the rain and mud put me off (I had had enough of that at HesFes05!) Instead the girls went together, with friends.
I’m looking forward to this one, despite the snow. I have just talked to my cousin who lives down that way, on MSN and she assures me there is no snow there and none predicated. So if we can get past Bristol, we’ll be fine.
Since we live an autonomous lifestyle, with our teenagers choosing to make their own decisions about their lives and education, as far as is possible, this has over spilled into taking care of themselves in every day life. They know we are there to help and advise and facilitate, at any time they want us to. They each get themselves up, or they don’t, as they choose. They do their home work or they don’t, as they choose. My stepson questioned this at the beginning, “How can they possibly be ready for real life and having a job, if they are not made to do school?”
Our answer, was that they will get up when they need to, if they are interested enough to do it. They will do their home work, getting information and help where needed if they are motivated enough to do it. This is exactly how it has turned out. David and Alice sort themselves out for college-although they know we’ll help if asked at any time, with home work or with getting a lift if the alarm hasn’t gone off.
They both chose to get themselves a Saturday job and are conscientious about getting there on time and being organised for it, with little help from us. They go and do it because they choose to and are motivated to do so.
They each wash and care for their own clothes anyway now, along with their own bedding. This came about as they each got their own room. If they don’t want me to be in there (and they usually don’t) tidying etc, then they are responsible for keeping things clean and tidy. They each have their own bedding that they have chosen and they keep the spare set in their rooms.
They decorated their own rooms (with a little help when requested). They worked out how much paint they would need and chose the colours within the budget they had been given.
They have bought rugs and cushions to their chosen colour scheme and have made them very homely.
The rooms do get untidy sometimes, but we no longer do anything about it. It simply has nothing to do with me. We have all been very pleased with the results. Since they have each had their own rooms many arguments have stopped. Before the girls shared a room and if Alice had tidied up, she got very cross if Lucy left anything out and vice versa. And each has a regular clear out as they like the rooms looking nice.
This is so much better a way for us, than the way things used to be, especially when Thomas my stepson lived here. I would nag for him to tidy up and get so exasperated when he didn’t. When the children were small I would, to my shame now, threaten that anything left out on the floor would get put in the rubbish bag. This just caused distress and more arguments.
Nowadays Tom and I have a room, which is our sanctuary and each of the youngsters have theirs. They are welcome into our room, they choose to knock before coming in as they ask that we do when going to their rooms, but come and go as they want to. To be honest, it is still a real pleasure when one of our teenagers comes in and lies on the bed and shares something with us, maybe something about their life, or something they are interested in, or to ask a question or discuss a theory they have, because they want to ;o)
I wish I had known about this before, I would have embraced co sleeping, continuum parenting and TCS from the beginning and saved myself a lot of heartache. I thank goodness for finding out about home education and meeting people, who led me to question the way I do things and have helped me arrive in a place in my life, where we can do things differently.
Tom and I have been on as much of a journey as the children, in fact we have probably come a lot further!
Some one asked me the other day whether I ever felt “stuff TCS?”
I have thought about this since and can honestly say that I find that a ‘Taking Children Seriously’ philosophy and lifestyle using the concepts of Common Preferences and Non -coercion IS THE way that works best for our family. This way, we have teens who are take responsibility for themselves and also choose to make living in an environment of five (and sometimes more) people something that can be pleasurable for everyone.
There is no division between life and learning. Happy people live in our house. I have lived here when it was a place with stressed, anxious teens and young children, who have been schooled because that is what we thought was the only way. We made them conform to the ‘norm’ of our society and we argued and had a very stressful, often unhappy life.
We all prefer life here now.
Tom’s back now from sorting out the car, so we’ll set off.
I will update this entry on our return, so that I can blog about the actual Gathering, so look out for that after Tuesday.
In the meantime someone else will be taking over the blog next week and I wish her as much enjoyment as I have had and I look forward to reading how HE works for another family
;o)
See you after the Gathering.
UPDATE after Okehampton Gathering;
Lucy and I arrived home on Tuesday-separately as I had to go via Head Office and Lucy returned with a friend directly home.
We have had a really enjoyable time.
I have got to know a lot of new people and reacquaint myself with people I already knew. One of the ladies helping to organise the new EO campaign website, I discovered i already knew in real life!
She and I have met and chatted at several camps and Lucy is friends with her daughter. We have seen each other on various lists and had no idea that we knew each other in real life too as we have never swapped email addresses! LOL!
The gathering was held at Okehampton YHA a converted ‘railway goods shed’ It was immediately next to a Steam Railway Station and over the weekend we saw steam trains fired up, which greatly pleased several of the small children (and some dads)!
There were lots of individual family rooms, so Lucy and I had our own room, with just two beds in, which I was pleased about. It was warm and had good basic facilities.
The atmosphere was friendly and relaxed and the food was good. Either veggie or vegan food was provided, so we were both happy (even vegan chocolate cake!)
As predicted there was no snow down in Devon, but a few friends didn’t make it as they were snowed in at home. However enough of Lucy’s friends arrived there to keep her happy.
The YHA was a great base to set off and see something of Dartmoor, which is always fabulous, whatever the weather.
Lucy went off for several walks with her friends, but mostly they didn’t stray from the town as it rained on and off all weekend.
I attended the open council meeting but missed the AGM as I gave someone a lift to Exeter station.
The meeting was interesting but went on for rather a long time.
I attended the EO Consultation Campaign Regional Workshop on the Sunday. That was very helpful, a sort of basic guide on what home educators can do about the up and coming Government consultation on HE.
I am going to help organise the regional one in Worcestershire on 31st March (details will be posted on campaign website, when the venue is confirmed), so I wanted to be sure to attend this one, so I could just sit and listen.
I asked Lucy for her comments to post here and she said she “met friends old and new, enjoyed the atmosphere, facilities and surroundings and would definitely go again!”
I’d second all of that and look forward to the next time.
Have a nice time at the gathering.
— Paula Feb 9, 06:00 pm #
Thanks for all the time you have put into writing the blog over the last few weeks, I have really enjoyed reading about how Home Education works for you and your family.
I’m looking forward to reading the update about your time at the gathering.
— June Feb 11, 10:49 pm #
oh go on…please tell us more!! Love Cxx
— Carlotta Mar 18, 05:18 pm #